Sometimes I'm thinking, am I pushing friends away...?
I mentioned this before, I'm very passive.
And when I say I'm passive, I mean super duper passive.
I'm never the kind of friend who will contact you when they feel like.
I just don't.
I'm afraid I might disturb others.
I don't know what to talk.
I'm not used to pour my heart to friend.
I do this to the blog, which also equals to the public.
But I can't start a word to a friend.
I'm used to being cut off.
I'm also used to listen, instead of speak.
I would say I'm a good listener, I can sit there and just listen to you.
Because I don't take the move, our relationship may just drop.
I don't know how to start a conversation, a casual talking.
I'm afraid of going out with just one person, I think it'll be super awkward.
Of course there are exceptions. But only a few.
Mostly, I'm really worried about it.
I would thought of all consequence that may happen, and most of them are bad.
What if we don't talk at all?
What if we turn out only playing phones?
What if we don't have mutual topics to talk?
What if we'll be super awkward after this outing?
I think a lot.
I know I shouldn't, but I do. I really do.
So I push the invitation off.
Being a super passive person, I don't have much friends.
Are you my friend?